Last week, I was 100% sure I would be having Otto euthanized at today’s appointment with a veterinarian who provides hospice and home-euthanasia services. I won’t beat around the bush; he’s still with us.
There was one important difference between last week and this: The “heat dome” that has kept California roasting for over a week finally broke, and temperatures dropped all the way down into the 80s, a welcome relief from a week with daily highs over 110°F. As dawn broke this morning, we even got a little spotty rain – bizarre for this area and this time of year, but welcome just the same.
As I said in my last post, Otto has never liked heat, and as an old guy, set in his ways, he was super grumpy about not being able to lay in his damp, shady sandbox outside. He didn’t want to be kept indoors (protected from the heat); he wanted to be outside, but outside was just awful! So he was extra miserable.
The veterinarian who came to my home today was impressed by Otto’s insistence at joining the scrum of dogs to greet her at my home-office door, even as young Boone and middle-aged Woody were knocking into him in their effusive greetings. She also was impressed by his intense interest in the treats I gave her to introduce herself to him. He’s also completely continent, in contrast to many of her other patients. Apparently, a lot of the dogs she sees in this type of practice are much closer to the end before their owners call her in, to the point where they won’t get up to greet someone, aren’t eating much, and are in diapers.
That made me feel a little bad; was I being over-anxious, pulling the trigger too soon? Maybe it’s the fact that I’ve been at the deathbed of loved ones – humans – who were in hospice care as well as those who were unable to receive hospice care for some reason; I just don’t want anyone I love to suffer before death. I’ve seen deathbed suffering; it’s ugly and unnecessary.
The doctor put some of my fears at ease. We discussed Otto’s panting, which I have interpreted as a symptom of pain and anxiety. She agreed that pain and anxiety could be a factor in his almost non-stop panting, but said something I’ve never heard before, that a lot of old dogs have enlarged livers (as I have been told Otto also has) and that as the liver enlarges, it pushes up against the diaphragm, and requires a little more forceful breathing.
She agreed that his front paws and elbows appear to be paining him quite a bit, and she could see how he has altered his posture to compensate, but thought that the amount of difficulty he shows in getting up from laying down is not too bad. As skinny as his thighs feel to me now, she thought his muscle tone was decent, given his age.
She also made me feel a bit better about the panic I was in last week. She said that a lot of old dogs have good days and bad days, and even good weeks and bad weeks, but that she often sees old dogs who look like they are death’s door bounce back when minor issues are addressed – and that the heat of last week was just pushing him past his ability to tolerate his chronic arthritic discomfort.
We reviewed his medications; he’s currently on omeprazole (for acid reflux), Galliprant (a non-steroidal anti-inflammatory), and Tramadol (a synthetic opioid). She suggested I add gabapentin back into the mix. I have had him on gabapentin before, for many months while he was also being given the Galliprant, but I could not say I ever saw any difference in either his discomfort or sleeping patterns when he was on it. But she thought the third medication might complement the Galliprant and Tramadol together, so I’ll give that a try again.
All in all, even though he seemed so much better today than he did last week, I’m so glad I brought this vet in for this examination and consultation. Given Otto’s lifelong aversion to slippery floors and most dogs’ apprehension to going to a vet’s office, it’s understandable that when I take him to see one of his regular vets, he always looks worse than he does as home, wide-eyed, trembling, and shaky. A month ago, I brought him to see his internal medicine doctor, and she seemed more dubious about his ability to go on than even I was last week. This morning, on his home turf, Otto seemed, for the most part, like a creaky, limpy, lumpy version of his usual unfailingly well-mannered and friendly self – if a little more unselfconscious about begging for treats than he ever used to be. Now this veterinarian will have an idea about his current baseline – where he is now, and what “too much” might look like. And I got some reassurance that I’m not doing to wrong thing by trying to keep him around at least a little longer.
A final note: Thank you all for your comments with support and advice. I read and appreciate every single one. I feel truly honored to be able to share my magnificent Otto with you, and I am grateful for your care and feeling for him more than I can possibly say.
Nancy, I could be the one that wrote this. After a horrific night with my 14+ cairn terrier (a rescue) with him having a second seizure and the aftermath, I was sure our vet was going to say it was time. I went in with no appointment before the doors even opened. He was wonderful in talking me off the cliff. Henri has pluminary hypertension Diagnosed January of this year with only a 6 to 9 months timeline by the cardiologist. My vet says he is in pretty good shape considering. On the line of mild to severe he would put him on the low end of moderate. I know we can not deal with the idea of our babies in pain or suffering. I too lost a love one who had Alzheimer’s. Totally set my feelings about pain and suffering, which should never be allowed to just go on.
I am so happy that your worry was relieved. You are blessed to have such a vet in your area. Thank goodness the weather has given Otto a break.
My prayers for Otto are added to my Henri’s. That we will have them with us now to live each day and we will know with help when the time is truly here.
I am so glad that Otto is still with you and with everyone else who reads your articles. The important factor in this article as well as in every other article you write is your love for Otto. I was in tears over Otto after reading your last article, today I am overjoyed that he is still there with you. Your great love for him speaks in every word you write, and there is no greater testament to your love than your regard for him and the care you devote to his well-being. It means that you are fully committed to him in every aspect. I wish that all animal owners were like you.
I know the break in the weather had to make Otto far more comfortable (it certainly helps everyone in CA!). I’m so glad the vet came for an assessment, and I hope you have many more lovely times spent together. Healing slurps to Otto!
Kathy, Tallulah, and Tucker
So glad that Otto is still around. Glad you found a vet to make a house call. You encourage me to keep up with my senior Great Labradane, Hope Joyful, who is 85 lbs, and about 9 1/2 years old. I too, have given him less than 1/8 cup of kibble to keep stool easy to pick up, otherwise it is all fresh whole food, and excellent supplements. She sleeps more and sometimes worries me but she is alert, looks to go for short works, drinks a lot more, before she did not drink enough, greats anyone who comes to door or visits no problems going to void herself. So I am keeping her as long as possible. Your review to us about Otto, encourages all of us with senior dogs. God bless you and your wonderful Otto, as well as the other adorable dogs.
God bless you and Hope Joyful. You inspire me with your commitment and understanding of her.
It’s almost 2 years since we had our old boy (18 days short of 16 years old) euthanized but still this brings tears to my eyes. It’s the hardest part of owning a beloved pet.
I’m glad the heat has improved so that Otto is more comfortable and still with you. You are doing your best for him and with help will know when the time has come to make that decision. It’s so hard but you will do the best for Otto, in the meantime enjoy him and the time you have left. My heart is aching for you but it’s obvious that Otto is in good hands. Hugs
Otto is so fortunate to be a part of your loving family! His recent “rally” makes my heart happy for all of you… That helps to soften the difficult times… Take care.
Along with lots of other folks I want to send you my best wishes and love as I know what you’re going through. It’s hard times and heart aching. But what I really wanted to say is the awful heat last week put us thru a lot , I have an adopted a nine-year-old border collie who much prefers to lie at the front gate or pace the path he’s worn along the front fence, or when it gets warm he lays in the open garage door looking out at that same area. But during the heat the last couple of weeks he’s been reluctant to come inside, but at 1 or 2 PM I would go out and call him in with a treat or two and keep him in until it eases up until after their dinner at 5 PM. I have a pug cross also but he’s smart enough to come inside, Hank will not give up his duty and unless I ‘encourage’ him. That heat dome we had certainly put us dog owners through a lot, but thank all the gods that things are cooler. Best of luck to you Nancy ,
Peggie
Nancy,
Consider yet another layer of medication for Otto—amantadine. This additional layer (Galliprant, tramadol, gabapentin plus amantadine) may provide Otto with additional relief. We successfully used a similar combination (carprofen, tramadol, gabapentin and amantadine) to keep our dogs, one who had degenerative myelopathy and one who had spinal neuropathy, comfortable and mobile. Good luck to Otto and you.
What a beautiful picture of Otto in his happy place, God bless you both.
Thank you for the Otto update! If he’s having a lot of trouble on slippery floors, you might consider Dr Buzby’s Toe Grips. I used them for my old girl, Keene, and they helped her feel more confident and stable before she passed.