I have a number of friends (and a family member) who have dogs who are nearing the end of their days. I’m noting and processing the events and feelings they are experiencing – and hoping it is several years before I’m in a similar situation (my heart dog, Otto, will be 12 years old in November).
Beau
My sister and her husband have a really old Schnauzer-mix named Beau. He might even be a real Schnauzer. He’s so old, it’s hard to tell! They took in Beau when a friend in distress couldn’t keep him. The friend had gotten Beau as a puppy when her son was 10 years old, and that son is in his late twenties now, so… Beau is old. He has limited vision, limited hearing, has had several strokes and can’t walk a straight line, and is growing increasingly incontinent. On his bad days, it seems almost cruel that he is being kept alive. He may stagger or not be able to get up, he acts like he doesn’t know where he is and is anxious, and he may just suddenly completely empty his bladder on the carpet while standing still, seemingly unaware he is doing so.
But on his good days, he runs up the hall with the rest of his housemates, eats with gusto, goes outside through the dog door and potties without assistance or a reminder to do so, and enjoys his time on the sofa and in bed with his human and canine housemates. So they are very much afraid that if they call the vet to make a euthanasia appointment on one of his bad days, and he’s having a good day on the day of the appointment, the vet may decline to euthanize, or the staff may make them feel like creeps! In fact, they feel sort of pre-emptively guilty about even just talking about “Beau’s time.” My sister and brother-in-law love Beau and want him to have a good end. But when is the right time?
Chaco and Lena
There is Chaco, one of my former foster dogs. She’s younger than Otto, but has two failing knees and severe arthritis, and her owner lacks the health insurance or budget to pay for two knee surgeries. Her declining mobility has contributed, it seems, to weight gain, which compounds her problems.
Another friend is in a similar position with Lena, Otto’s very first playmate and friend. She has had one ACL surgically repaired, and underwent “conservative management” when the second one tore; her veterinarian says her hips, too, are quite dysplastic, and would have benefitted from surgery. Both hips and both knees, too? Her very devoted owner, my friend, could not have possibly paid for four surgeries – nor could she have gotten or afforded insurance after the first knee injury and x-rays showed the hip problems. Lena is maintained on daily pain medication and various joint supplements, and my friend takes her for frequent drives to places where she can take short, gentle walks. My friend has also been shopping for some sort of wagon or cart she could use to take the 70-pound dog on walks, so she at least can enjoy the changing scenery and odors. Lena, like Chaco, is getting fairly crippled, but is in otherwise good health and appetite. How long can my friends maintain them in this condition?
How to know when to let them go
Super dedicated owners can provide hospice care for dogs, if they are physically and emotionally able and have an appropriate home and time to do so. We ran a great article about this in 2010; it holds up well today. But not everyone has a schedule and home that would permit, as just one example, helping a large non-ambulatory dog outside to potty several times a day.
Not unrelated: Between all my dog-loving friends, I am aware of exactly ONE DOG who died peacefully in his sleep.
I just went looking; here are some links for information on how to know when “the time” is right for euthanasia:
https://www.americanhumane.org/fact-sheet/euthanasia-making-the-decision/
https://www.lapoflove.com/Quality-of-Life/How-Will-I-Know-It-Is-Time
When it is getting close to time to make an appointment for euthanasia, we have some other helpful articles to read. This one is by a long-time contributor to WDJ, trainer Lisa Rodier.
Also, trainer Jill Breitner’s article on what to ask before making an appointment for euthanasia and the companion piece to that article by Dr. Sally J. Foote are excellent sources of information about what you should know in advance.
Wow! So many wonderful stories! Had to stop reading, as I started sobbing. I held onto my Rottweiler, and Boxer way too long, and a shepherd mix I lost due to a tumor. I couldn’t let go. It was bad. Then the guilt has never let go of me. I still can’t look at pictures, and it’s been 7 years. I have two little ones now, still pretty young. Isn’t it funny, all the things you will do to make them last as long as you can. They eat better than I do!
In my long life of 70 years I have never out of 16 wonderful dogs,all breeds, mostly GSD, had one die in his sleep,and it has never gotten ANY easier….except I sure know what to expect,so very hard,and I have 2 now,a10 yr old lab and a 3 yr old GSD, but I must say an owner knows …when you live with a dog 24-7 you come to know them so well that when they need to go you know….
I think I may be providing hospice care for my dog. He is a 20 lb dog who is about 14. He is not in pain and eats well and eliminates well. However he is deaf, blind and either incontinent (meaning a physical problem) or is just lost in the mists of time. He spent his first 6 years in a puppy mill and I think probably never learned a sense of guilt over pottying in the house. When he could see and hear and I noticed him sniffing around I could ask he he needed to go outside and if he did, he would run to the back door and I would let him outside. When he went blind he would still run to the back door but would not go out by himself. Now I cannot communicate with him. So we are in pee pad territory but mostly I use them to mop up followed by cleaning the spot. No rugs thank God.
Over the years I have had several dogs that needed my help to relieve cancer symptoms by using euthanasia. I have 2 senior Great Danes at this time both female that I am in full time care of. Daisy has wobblers syndrome and has bladder control issues. They also found that she has heart problems. Daisy turns 11 years old in December. Lily cannot walk up stairs or get into vehicles. She has a hard time getting down to the floor to lay down and then when she wants to get back up she struggles to get back up. I need to be there for her. I have caught her several times from falling. This is 138 lb dog. I am catching. She is losing her eye sight and it makes it hard for her to walk on wooden floors. She does not trust them. Lily is going on to 9 years old.
I also have one male Great Dane 3 years old. He has pancreatis. I have him on a low fat diet and watch him very closely making sure that he does not get any table scraps at all.
I may take it to the extreme with my dogs and yes I have very large dogs and a lot of them. I made the commitment the day I brought them into my home as a puppy. It is my obligation to follow through with these dogs and make sure they are taken care of the best that I have the ability to do so. When it comes to their time to go? That is one of the hardest things we as the pet owners with all our love have to decide on. For instance my daughter just recently had to make that decision and it was one that she kept putting off after making the appointment with her pets doctor over a years time several times in fact. Maxx was a very special dog to the family and he to did not want to give up. But in the end he was in a lot of pain, lost so much weight and stopped eating. It was the right time. I know with the two Great Danes of mine I have been very lucky to have the time that I have had with them I hope to have more but not at the expense that they suffer.
My dog died with me in the bed.
Was it peaceful. Well, he did have some sort of seizure or heart attack right at the end. But prior to that he was so happy to be with me. He snuggled with me. And I was stroking him and talking to him right before he spasmed. So I count it a peaceful death. He was where he wanted to be.
That said, we had an appointment to go into the vet for him to be euthanized on Saturday. He died the previous Thursday night. He was 14 and 9 months and had been diagnosed with bone cancer in his pelvis, had had a large mast tumor removed from his back, four vertibrae had extreme arthritis and the discs were pretty much worn away and his potassium levels were elevated and going higher. He was managed on pain meds and CBD but I could tell his quality of life was going down. It was painful for him to walk and he had lost bladder control twice not making it out the back door in time.
I am still grateful he passed on his own time and with me. It was a release for both of us.
I grieved but his death was not as traumatic to me as that of my forever dog, Caesar, who passed away at the vet’s office before I could pick him up to bring him home. He also had cancer and I never knew. He went so fast I am still traumatized by it.
My current puppy is 9 months and 84 pounds. I am already thinking about how I will manage her end of life should she become immobile as I cannot lift a 90 lbs dog. I will be in my 70s by then.
Hopefully it is a fast choice not a lingering one. I have had to do it with three dogs and assorted small pets. Always gut wrenching. If fortunate they and you have adjusted to them being an elder dog. In all three cases the end was sudden. And necessary. My dr says people are never making a poor choice if it is sooner rather than later. If your beloved pet suffers and you feel it was because you could not let go that is an awful thing to regret.
Years ago when I was in veterinary practice when clients would ask how to know when it was time I would tell them, “You’ll know”. And they invariably did. It was the point where the pain of watching a beloved pet suffer became greater than the fear and pain of losing the pet.
How timely of an article. I have a 12 year old Belgian Tervuren. She has degenerative myelopathy and most likely liver cancer. With the DM she’s been holding her own for about 5 months. Last Tuesday we went out to a river and she was happy. The next 2 days she was shuffling her rear feet much more than she had been. Friday she was not getting up on her own nor able to walk more than a couple steps. But, she was still happy, alert and eating as well as normal. She wasn’t fitting the criteria I’ve set for euthanasia. Saturday and Sunday she was somewhat better but I called my dear vet at home to just talk. She said she would call in to the drugstore a couple meds to try that might help and buy her time or they may not work. As much as I do not like steroids she was started on a high dose of it along with gabapentin and wow. Within 24 hours she was back to standing, walking and even able to hop up on the couch. I was surely thinking it was time for euthanasia but I was wrong. As long as these meds work she’ll be with me another day.
A friend once later thanked me for telling her one thing when she was facing this issue. “Better a week too early than a day too late.”
Thank you. I’ve been struggling with such deep guilt for thinking our dear Jet was put down too soon.. His last day was a good day and I think that’s why I’m struggling so much- though his diagnosis was terminal and I knew we were on borrowed time with him. This comforts me knowing that he didn’t need to deteriorate any more than we allowed. He trusted us to make the right decision when that day would come. I hope someday I can believe not just in my head but also my heart that his last day was the right day to say goodbye. 😢
Last spring, my Chow mix started not feeling well. She was a rescue, but around 8-9 years old. Her vet ran every blood test and examined her thoroughly, she was diagnosed with uveitis, given antibiotics and steroids and bounced back to notmal – for about three months. She started being weak, and losing her appetite. Back to the vet. More blood tests, full body x-rays, and two vets examined her. Another round of antibiotics. Ten days later, she seemed worse. This time, her vet and I now feel the tumors in several places. The vet did a biopsy, and we had to wait for lab results. The next day she just wanted to lay on the back porch or in the back yard. She was miserable, and I was praying we could help her. Early the next morning , around 5AM, I heard her having a seizure in her sleep. The next 90 minutes were some of the worst of my life! I called the Emergency Vet, but they could do nothing unless I could bring her in. I was alone, upstairs, and she weighed 55 pounds. All I could do was pet her, talk to her and cry. After another hour and another seizure, she passed away next to my bed. Her vet was beside herself too. We got the lymphoma diagnosis from the lab two days later. If euthanasia would have prevented her suffering, I would have sadly done it.